Adoption the continuing story

If you don't already know we started the process to adopt siblings here in Mexico 2 years ago.  The Lord has been faithful we have seen much progress recently.  In July we found out there was a sister and brother at the orphanage that we had been helping out at for 2 years that might be available for adoption.  We immediately pursued this with the DIF the Mexican adoption services here right away.  In October we were given the rights to start having the kids Oscar and Fatima come for the weekend visits to our house as well as school break vacations.

This was a good time to build the relationships but proved to be very hard on all involved with the constant changes.  We began to pray that the Lord would work something out so the kids could come live with us soon and we could start being a family on a permanent basis.   For Spring Break vacation we went to pick up the kids from the orphanage were they lived for our visit and through a turn of events at that time we still have them!  God worked through the situation and the DIF  gave us the rights to have the kids in our home until the adoption was finalized.  Of course this happened very quickly and we were unprepared but God has been faithful and we are all learning and growing through this time.  Oscar came to us having just spent a very difficult time in the hospital for a week due to a perforated bowel from a appendectomy.  As you can imagine this was a difficult transition for him.  He went through a lot of trauma and came to us on a roller coaster of emotions.  The first few weeks were trying for everyone.  One minute life was good the next he was defiant and the next he was crying.  This time took a lot of prayer and patience until we began to see a slight improvement.  Fatima transitioned well at first but now struggles with the basic issues of feeling accepted and equal to the Grace and Hattie.  Both kids struggle with what the world labels as RAD(reactive attachment disorder.)  This implies that a young age they were not cared for in the right ways, abandoned, or not loved.  After much reading and prayer we believe that this is the worlds label and  not one we like to use.  A Biblical view of this is extremely different.  God says " For My thoughts are not your thoughts, nor are your ways My ways."  (Isa 55:8)  God is our creator and he knows us completely what makes us tic, how we breakdown, and how to fix that which is broken.  As God is the expert we cannot look for answers anywhere else but in His word.  That is what we are doing.  We find again and again that the root of this problem is sin.  The major issues in what the world labels as a RAD child include self-preservation (selfishness), control, fear and anger, bitterness and brooding, and making emotional rather than rational decisions.  Overall these fit the Bibles definition of an "angry man"(Prov. 29:22).  Using God's Word as we deal with the issues that come up with Oscar and Fatima we are able to identify the sin issue and from there understand what is the particular motivation in the moment.  With this guide we are able to lead, shepherd and discipline with a clearer understanding of what the Lord desires.  Ultimately we pray for salvation for each one of our kids knowing that only God can change their hearts to desire to obey and glorify Him.  Much of what we have read about this topic comes from an excellent book called  Parenting the Difficult Child by Linda J. Rice.  I encourage you to read this as the information applies to adoption, RAD, your own children, grandchildren or kids you know through other venues.    We are patiently and prayerfully anticipating what God has for us on this journey of adoption.  We know that it is God's will and we do not look back.  We know that the Lord has given us one of the best opportunities on this earth to live out the redemption story and we are thankful for it.  It is not easy and there are moments of desperation yet we are reminded that anytime we face a trial and it brings us closer to Christ we are blessed!  I hope to continue this story here as well as provide any help and information we find about  adoption, parenting and homeschool.  Pray for us that the adoption process would be finalized quickly,  that when we finalize the adoption we would be prepared to begin homeschool with all four of the kids,  and that we would have wisdom as we parent, train and disciple our children in the grace of God. 
for His glory-